Counsel Me
by ChirpChirp1827
Summary: A series of drabbles on Tsuna's council as they give him barely any advice and end up being a pain in his ass most days [but thats okay because they're his brothers in all the ways that matter].
1. Phobia

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TSUNA, ENMA, XANXUS, DINO OR ANYTHING ELSE YOU RECOGNIZE IN THIS STORY.**

**Counsel Me**

**Prompt: **Phobia

* * *

Enma busted into the meeting room carrying a bag with grease dripping from the bottom and a cardboard drink holder.

"What is that?" questioned Tsuna as he eyed the bag. He was sitting at the head of the table, a pile of papers in front of him and the Vongola Crest engraved in the wall behind him.

"Food that's going to make me want to puke it's so good since it seemed like we might be here a while," Enma answered as he dropped it. He threw a burger to each of the rooms occupants before passing the drinks out, "I got shaved ice for Dino, Tsuna, and I and a coffee for Xanxus."

There was a moment before Dino let out a small laugh, "I'd forgotten about Xanxus's thing with ice."

"I fucking dare you to repeat that, trash," Xanxus threatened, his eyes narrowing as he watched the Cavallone boss hop off the table and settle himself into his chair.

"I just don't get it," Dino declared. "What you were trapped in was hardly ice right? I mean it was created from _flames_."

Xanxus's eyebrow twitched before he sneered, "I just don't get your obsession with the shark trash either. He's always picked me over you."

Dino's eyes flared and the burger in his hands collasped under his grip.

"Right then," Tsuna interrupted, "we've got fifty applicants for allies to go through and hundreds of years of history we need to cover for a lot of them."

Neither looked away from Tsuna but neither moved to attack either.

* * *

**E/n: **Right so I let you guys vote on what story you wanted me to do and the Vongola Counsel was pulling way ahead and I really liked the idea as well.

For those of you who are new to my stories the Vongola council is a council that is made up of an advisor from an organization within the Vongola (the Varia/Xanxus in Tsuna's case) and the two closest allies (Enma/the Shimon and Dino/the Cavallone).


	2. Addict

**Counsel Me**

**Prompt: **Addict

* * *

"Tsuna!" Dino cried on the other side of the phone.

Tsuna flinched, pulling the phone away for a minute before answering, "Dino, what's wrong?"

Tsuna heard what sounded like a cry from the from the blonde. "Xanxus and Enma keep sending me facebook requests for tickets!"

"Oh," Tsuna looked down at his phone, thumbing in the password and smiling when he found he had a candy crush notification from Xanxus. "They've been sending them to me too."

"It's weird!"

Tsuna's eyebrow knitted together as he answered the request before asking, "Why is that? You're always playing before meetings. Isn't it natural they send them to you?"

"It's okay with Enma but," Dino's phone chimed in the background, "isn't it weird that Xanxus is asking me for a life instead of trying to take mine a way?!"

Tsuna found himself suddenly laughing so hard he couldn't breathe.

* * *

**E/n: **i just really love Dino and am really frustrated by being the only one in my home who doesn't play Candy Crush


	3. Dance

**Counsel Me**

**Prompt: **Dance

* * *

Xanxus scowled as he walked into the ballroom.

Music flooded his ears and he grunted out, "If you're going to get plastered make sure you can get one of the Decimo guardians to carry you to our fucking wing because I'm not doing it."

There was a squeal from someone (whether is was Lussuria or Belphegor he wasn't sure) before the group scattered in all directions.

"Xanxus!" He turned to find Enma and Tsuna barreling towards him, the redhead pulling Tsuna along with a bright grin on his face. "I'm so glad you're here now."

Tsuna gave him a small smile, "I'm glad you made it."

Xanxus clicked his tongue before addressing Enma, "What do you want twerp?"

"Come with me!" Enma exclaimed, dropping Tsuna's hand to grab Xanxus' wrist. "Adel refuses to leave me alone unless I'm with Tsuna but he's got to mingle and she should spend sometime with Julie. They never have any time alone with three kids running around my mansion."

Xanxus clicked his tongue and Tsuna opened his mouth, ready to insist that Enma drop the idea, only to close it when Xanxus held out his arm, "Let's go then. If I dance with you maybe the trashes daughters will stop asking me."

Enma gave a laugh as he looped his arm through Xanxus', "I don't think anything short of death will make them stop."

Tsuna gaped at them for a minute before Reborn gestured for him to come to him.

* * *

**E/n: **I actually ship D/S really hard and ship X/S as a...Tsuna/Lambo/Hayato kind of relationship? It's brotherly.

Xanxus/Enma is just something I'm playing with but I like them as a friendship. They compliment each other very nicely I think


	4. Sing

**Counsel Me**

**Prompt: **Sing

* * *

Enma's knees sunk into the mattress as he jumped onto Tsuna's bed. "So you couldn't convince Xanxus to come?"

"Nope," Tsuna answered, spinning around in his chair. "But I suppose that's because he's so much older then us. He probably thinks it's childish that we're still having sleepovers whenever Kyoya leaves town."

"Maybe but Dino came so maybe it's not all that childish?" The two of them turned, watching Dino as the oldest of the three present struggled to get his head through his shirt. After a moment, Enma burst into laughter. "You're right. Xanxus definitely found this childish."

"Guys someone help me," Dino squeaked.

Tsuna laughed, reaching over to turn the volume on the stereo up, "I'm sorry, Dino-nii. I can't hear you over the music."

"You're such a liar! I liked you much better when you were young!"

* * *

**E/n: **I considered, for a second, having this one be them walking on Xanxus singing to dumb pop songs and then i remembered Xanxus lives in a mansion with people who dont know what privacy means so he probably doesn't do that.


	5. Cruise

**Counsel Me**

**Prompt: **Cruise

* * *

"Trash get the fuck out of my sun," Xanxus shouted.

Tsuna ducked just in time to avoid the boot that came flying at his head. He crossed his arms as he turned to him, "You could have asked more politely."

Xanxus clicked his tongue, looking away from Tsuna.

"Xanxus seriously-" Tsuna began.

Enma cut him off shouting, "I think I'm going to be sick."

Tsuna groaned as he listened to Enma heave and the sickening plop of the substance falling into the sea. "We're on a yacht Enma! You can't even feel it move."

"Um..." Tsuna felt his stomach drop when he looked up to find Dino rubbing the back of his neck.

He took a deep breath, "Dino, please tell me you didn't-"

"I kind of lost Enzio."

Tsuna let out a shrill scream as the turtle's head popped up behind the boat. "I can't go anywhere with you people around! You're worse then my guardians."

All three men gave a laugh, Enma's light and sickly and Xanxus's a loud puff while Dino gripped his stomach, before Dino managed to choke out, "Even we aren't that dysfunctional."


	6. Careen

**Counsel Me**

**Prompt: **Careen

* * *

"I don't understand a thing this says," Dino admitted after a moment.

Tsuna groaned from the backseat, "Dino-nii! You're almost thirty, you should know how to read a map!"

"You're over twenty! What's your excuse!?" Dino snapped back.

"Shut the hell up trash!" Xanxus snapped. Both boys were thrown against their doors as the car turned around the corner.

Buckled in behind the drivers seat, Enma laughed, "Xanxus you shouldn't drive so fast if you can't turn properly."

The Varia leader glanced up at the mirror, meeting Enma's red eyes, "I will crash us on purpose I swear to god, you ginger asshole."

"My hair is too dark to be ginger!" Enma protested.

Xanxus took another turn, and Tsuna slid into Enma. The two youngest groaned as their shoulders bumped together painfully.

Tsuna groaned, "Right, pull over Xanxus. I'll drive and you can read the map."

"I am not reading a shitty map."

Enma giggled, "Xanxus do you not know how to either?"

"Of course I know how to read a fucking map."

"Then pull over!" Tsuna screeched. "Otherwise we're not gonna be late to the meeting, we're never going to arrive! You would think I would know how to get to meetings that my family plans."

* * *

**E/n: **I don't know why, but this might be my favorite thing I've written for this series.

I thrive off silly mafia boys dont being able to do normal things


	7. Psychics

**Counsel Me**

**Prompt: **Psychics

* * *

Tsuna hit the bottom of the papers against the table, straightening them as he declared, "That's all of them for today."

"Finally," Enma groaned, standing up and twisting his torso. "I'm so sick of sitting down. Xanxus, Dino do you want to come to dinner with Tsuna and I? He's going to the Russian place that just-"

"I don't remember agreeing to that," Tsuna interrupted.

Enma laughed, "Not yet but you would have the second I asked. You're contractually obligated as my best friend to buy me food when I travel three thousand miles to talk to you."

"Except you didn't come to see me, you came because it's in your job description and it's barely an hour on your private jet." They stared at each other for a minute before Tsuna leaned back in his chair and said, "Besides, I said this was all of the papers for today. Not that it was all for today."

Xanxus clicked his tongue before growling, "What is there left to do, trash?"

"Alliance Science convention is in two months," Tsuna declared. "Since the three of us are sharing all of our technology, we need to decide which back models we're sending there with Shoichi."

Dino groaned, "I'll give them all of the technology if they just stop having these things. Can't we strike _this _from the alliance guidelines?"

"I wish," Tsuna sighed. "It's so hard to convince Spanner and Shoichi to share anything they designed."

Xanxus gave a loud barking laugh as he stood up, "Have fun trash. This has nothing to do with me, I'm going to buy some more liqour."

"No! Xanxus don't you dare!" Enma complained, grabbing feebly for the mans coat as he breezed past the Shimon's chair. A slight swing of his hips but him just outside Enma's reach and the redhead slumped with a whined, "You're the worse!"

His mocking laughter echoed as he stepped outside the doors.

* * *

**E/n: **I really am not intending to write Xanxus/Enma in every fucking one of these it just keeps happening by accident.

Anyway, I imagine there's prolly like a science convention where all the allied families share technology but everyone actually shows up with technology from like five years ago and so the Vongola Council who are usually families close enough to share all their tech among each other hate the whole vent because not only does Tsuna have to plan everything but the three of them have to agree on which techs to send and get their mechanics to agree.


	8. Insomniac

**Counsel Me**

**Prompt:** Insomniac

* * *

"This had better be good, you fucking trash," Xanxus groaned into the phone as he pressed his phone to his ear. Darkness swarmed around him with the exception of the alarm clocks blinking '2:49.'

Dino soft laugh came through the phone, "That was an unexpectedly nice greeting from you, Xanxus!"

Xanxus resisted the urge to crush his phone in his hand and growled out, "I'll fucking kill you if you don't get to the point."

"Ah! There's the Xanxus I know and hate."

"What the fuck do you want, Cavallone!"

There was soft breathing and the shifting of a bed before Dino murmured, "If I died would you keep him safe?"

"Are you planning on letting me shoot you?"

"Haha, I'm not planning on dying at all. But this is a tough job."

Xanxus buried his face in his pillows for moment before grunting, "Who is him?"

Dino was silent before saying, "Tsunayoshi...Kyoya..."

"The shark trash," Xanxus finished for him."

There was squeaking again, and Xanxus could practically picture the pansy ass blonde reaching over to brush hair from Squalo's face as the other slept. "Squalo, yeah."

"Your an idiot," Xanxus deadpanned and threw his phone at the wall before nestling against his pillows.

If the idiot wanted to keep them safe, he should just make sure not to get himself killed.

* * *

**E/n: **and that is really all there is to say on the matter folks.

(except its not because im super sorry for posting this on friday instead of thursday, i just got super busy on halloween)


	9. Bath

**Counsel Me**

**Prompt: **Bath

* * *

Tsuna let his shoulder slip under the hot water, settling when it tickled his upper lip just below his nose. Steam swirled in the air around him, burning his skin red, but it felt relaxing and helped ease the pain that throbbed in his head.

The day had been tough with the annual Vongola Alliance Meeting starting that week and his home was filled with visitors. In most cases, they were visitors who the whole of Tsuna's inner circle was close to and the arguments between his, Byakuran's, and Xanxus' guardians were starting to affect him.

He slipped farther into the tub, sighing. Before he could duck under to wet his hair, the door was kicked in and slammed shut.

He sat up in a hurry, water splashing before he found the person Xanxus was settling himself on the toilet seat and pulling his phone out.

"Xanxus? What are you-"

"That fucking albino trash won't shut up," he growled. "I'm staying in here until he goes to sleep."

Tsuna couldn't help the giggle that erupted from his mouth. "I really don't think you need to hide from Byakuran."

"I don't think you know your friend well enough if you think that's fucking true."

Tsuna just laughed again and slid under the water.


	10. Homo

**Counsel Me**

**Prompt: **Homo

* * *

"My house has been overrun by a child," Dino exclaimed, throwing his hands up as he walked into the Shimon mansion. "I regret making friends with Byakuran. All it has done is make Bluebell think it's okay to storm into my home and steal my tur-"

He paused when he found that Enma and Tsuna were sitting in the living room, paint smeared across Enma's face and spotting Tsuna's mass of hair.

"What...happened here?" he asked cautiously.

"Adel's kids are horrible little brats when their mother isn't around," Tsuna growled.

Enma gave a nervous laugh, "I'm watching them since she and Julie took a mission together, I guess assassinating people is their idea of a date night, and I thought it would be nice to let them finger paint but..."

They stared at each other for a minute before sighing in unison, "I'm glad I can't have kids."


End file.
